I could really use a definitive win right now. I’m so tired of losing. Something that will allow me to enjoy a little happiness for a while and make me have a better outlook on the rest of my life. Whether it be my band getting the guitarist we need to really get moving and nudge my dream closer to reality, or a long overdue promotion at my job where I can really use my skills instead of being made to feel that the only thing I’m worthy of doing is answering a phone and fixing petty problems and taking years off of my life in the process. Christ, even some clear signs that would point me in the direction I should be going that would be a better route to success for a career, even if it’s not in IT.
Or how about… just a friend? A true friend. Someone that is available to talk to. Someone to be there for me and me for them. I don’t even know what that feels like anymore. So many people have come and gone over the years, and so much of my life feels wasted from the time I spent with them.
Every time I think I’m out of the dark place, something makes me look around and find that I’ve never really left.