I used to be guilty of airing a little bit of my dirty laundry on Facebook every now and then, along with the occasional “Vaguebooking”. Then sometime in the course of time between my late 30’s and early 40’s, I started finally seeing how immature it was, and being not much more than attention and pity-seeking, with a grand dose of seeking affirmation. I realized that a truly strong and mature person did not need these things, as most of it was issues that one should work out within themselves and truly learn from, instead of seeking the affirmations from others. You could say I became enlightened. Or “woke” in the popular terminology of today.
I also feel that I came to these conclusions rather late in life. Which makes it all the more sad when I see younger people who became educated much earlier in life, and whom I felt should have reached some form of emotional maturity far earlier than I did. People younger than me, who are now hitting their early-to-mid 30’s, that I expected so much more out of. People that I shared deep, intimate conversations with years ago, of whom I felt I shared a sort of connection with; a sort of nudge-nudge-wink-wink-we’re-not-like-most-people type of thing.
But alas, it becomes just another example of having any sort of expectations about anything or anyone. The person of whom I speak is going through a divorce, and is restarting her life. One week she is posting about being strong and independent, and the next she is whining about being a failure and making bad decisions. And she is getting what she was looking for, I suppose- people posting comments telling her how strong she is and how she’s got this and such.
I feel that it’s sad how one forgets those deep connections they’ve made in the past. Instead of seeking the superficial uplifting comments of her old common acquaintances, she could turn to someone who would encourage her to look within to work out and recognize the real answers for herself.
However, I also know this is rather selfish of me, and a part of my ego that I’m still working on. Along the same lines, she is just another in the growing list of people with whom I’ve confided in in the past, who have now turned to the social media masses for counsel instead of an old, trusted friend. I shouldn’t let this bother me, as these are the hard lessons of the 12th house.